Tips on Maintaining Connection in Relationships

Tips on Maintaining Connection in Relationships

Recently, I taught at a local ministry school on the topic of “connection”. As I was preparing for that service, I asked my Facebook friends to give me their best tips on maintaining connection in relationship.

I had over 30 comments on that Facebook post and there was a lot of wisdom that was shared. Here’s a few of my favorites, compiled, to encourage us all in the area of connection in our relationships!

1. Vulnerability is your greatest strength. We are not whole until we are in community.

2. No matter how long it’s been since you last saw them – pick up where you left off. Laugh, giggle, whisper, cry… do all the things you did that started the friendship.

3. Don’t become too busy that you let your friends and family go.

4. Authentic, vulnerable, purposeful communication and interaction. Looking into someone’s eyes… actually seeing their face.

5. Time is so valuable. Time, unconditional time.

6. Selflessness. Connecting with the other person in the way they need connection, rather than your mode of connection.

7. Intentionality. Without it, life just goes by and we forget to connect.

8. Creating a safe place where people feel they can trust and be trusted. In that place, vulnerability happens and somehow communication seems easier. 

9. Connection is being with the person in their moment of happiness, sadness, etc… not trying to put your agenda first, but seeking to understand what that person needs in the moment. 

10. Sometimes it was late at night when our son REALLY wanted to talk… so we stayed up!

11. Boundaries for me are crucial in maintaining healthy relationships.

12. Eye to eye connection… So many people are lonely because God created us for heart to heart, soul to soul connection – not a wi-fi connection.

13. The hardest part of communication for me is the first step. Pick up the phone and ask to get together. I procrastinate or think I’m too busy to do one of the most important things Jesus asks us to do.

~By: my wise Facebook friends 😉

new dani whimsy


Energized to Love

Energized to Love

Love. We fall in. We grow in. We give. We receive. There’s many good things in the world but 1 Corinthians tells us the greatest is… love. The church tells us to walk in love. Our moms tell us to love our siblings. Love and marriage go together, well, like a horse and carriage. We all know love isn’t just a feeling. DC Talk taught us that love is a verb and Heidi Baker taught us that ‘love looks like something’. But honestly, what does it mean to love?

Reading in Philippians 2 this morning, I found some practical instruction. I checked several translations and borrowed from them all.

  • Don’t let selfishness and prideful agenda take over.
  • Embrace true humility.
  • Be deep-spirited friends.
  • Don’t push your way to the front.
  • Look out for the interests of others.
  • Don’t sweet-talk your way to the top.
  • Put yourself aside and help others get ahead.
  • Be sincere.
  • Think of others as better than yourselves.
  • Don’t try to impress others.
  • Forget yourselves long enough to lend a helping hand.


On paper these are easy, in reality though, this is going to take some work. But I love that in verse 13 of Philippians 2, there’s a promise of help, “God is energizing you so that you will desire and do what always pleases Him.”  As we turn the page into 2014, let’s learn to let LOVE reign in our hearts and in our lives!