I suppose the temptation to live as a martyr can hit either gender – male or female. But there’s something about being a mom and wife and the primary keeper of the home that ramps up that temptation. Let me explain.
I was reading 1 Corinthians 13 again the other day (in The Voice translation) and when I got to verse 3, I felt an “ouch” hit my soul.
“I could give all that I have to feed the poor, I could surrender my body to be burned as a martyr, but if I do not live in love, I gain nothing by my selfless acts.” (emphasis mine)
Being mom, wife and keeper of the home… requires lots of selfless acts. Regarding a certain situation a couple months ago, I told my husband, “If it comes down to the kids’ wants or mine. They win. I lose. Mom always loses.” I spoke this in a whiny, low moment but that doesn’t negate the fact that it’s pretty true most of the time. That is the life of a parent. Giving up myself for them.
The sacrifice of my life for them is a worthy sacrifice. If I can live in love, it is a life with countless rewards. But living as a martyr without love – that’s an ugly, sad state to live in. It’s not quite as drastic as surrendering my body to be burned but the mentality of “Woe is me… I always give up myself for my family…”, that victim mentality is crippling and not one of love. Offering that mentality up can be a daily choice for me. But one I must make if I’m going to serve my family in love.
***This is Day 24 of “31 Days of Offering Up” – part of the #write31days challenge. To read all the posts in order, please visit the overview page.***